Relationship : Honesty

in steemit •  6 years ago 

Honesty is a key component of a healthy relationship, not only because it helps us avoid harmful breaches of trust, but because it allows us to live in reality instead of fantasy and to share this reality with another.
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What is Honesty?

The act, quality, or condition of being honest; to be truthful.

When you know you can totally trust your mate, it strengthens your love.

When you know you can totally trust your mate, it removes a large potential for worry. It also builds your internal security so that you not only feel good about your partner, but you also feel better about life. Having an honest relationship creates a kind of buffer between you and the difficulties of the world. Having a mate you can trust and rely on also makes it easier to take those risks that help us grow.

Many people feel that little white lies, which may spare their partner some grief, are okay, and in some cases that’s true. But you can’t have a culture of honesty in your relationship just some of the time. If you tend to omit or color the truth, so things look a better, it could actually damage your relationship at a core level. Trying to “protect” your partner or just trying to avoid looking bad can create more trouble than it’s worth. It is best to be above board in all your dealings.

When asked about what qualities they want in a partner, most people will list “honesty” among them. Unfortunately, most of us have had the experience of being lied to. When you have a relationship and a family, you need to know that everyone is on the same page, and this is hard to do unless both of you are being honest.

What honesty gives you is a great deal of comfort. Knowing you can implicitly trust your mate allows you to be your best self, and your relationship will continue to thrive because you are able to give each other the positive energy you need to navigate life’s ups and downs.

Honesty is not just about telling the truth, either. It is also about telling the truth in a way that your partner will hear it and benefit from it. We all want to hear how great we are, of course, but we can also benefit from making some slight adjustments in how we do things. This is where a little honesty from someone you love and trust will help you make the small changes that can make your world a better place.
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In this case, honesty needs to be tender. If you have to say something to your loved one that may be unsetting to him or her, I suggest you do it as gently as possible. “Brutal honesty” has gotten a lot of press lately, but I have seen it do more damage than good. You need to present your issues with some degree of kindness. If not, your message may be buried in an avalanche of hurt feelings.You will both be much more able to communicate if your hearts are not wounded in the process.

Honesty is a way of life, not just a behavior. Keeping it paramount in your relationship will bring in more good and keep the bad stuff at bay. Knowing you can totally trust one another brings a type of freedom and comfort that helps your relationship work in the best way possible.

Been honest when you are in a relationship strengthens or empower your relationship to last longer.
Honesty begets "Trust" while dishonesty begets "Doubt".
Honesty is essential in healthy relationships. It has the power to build , empower and grow relationships.

"Intuition is the main weapon we have to know if someone is lying. ... Trust and honesty requires openness and truth, not lies and cover-ups. Emotional honesty: Being emotionally honest with both yourself and your partner is a very good starting place when developing a relationship."

Reasons why Honesty is Important. Almost everyone has been hurt at some point because of a secret, a distorted truth, a lie, and/or the discovery of something that should have been talked about openly. Dishonesty hurts because it undermines the relationship, breaks trust and is the opposite of intimacy.

Honesty is paramount in all relationships, and I am talking here about romantic relationships.

I think honesty is probably the MOST important thing for a relationship to survive and thrive. It is a foundation for everything else and is critical in all areas of a couples’ life together. It is essential when discussing and making decisions about children, finances, work, and social life and without it, everything else is unstable and shaky. It is like a house that has structural problems, sooner or later it will fall apart or will need constant repair, only to have problems again.

If there is the lack of honesty, you never truly know who your partner is and what is happening in their inner and outer world.

Dishonesty can be about feelings and thoughts as well as about behavior. Both are extremely damaging to a relationship. Lack of trust will always lead to conflict, doubt, suspicion, insecurity, or anger. It is a wound that keeps getting infected.
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I see many couples in my practice who come in to deal with “trust issues.” Breach of trust is a major trauma to a relationship and we, therapists, call it “attachment trauma.” It means exactly as it sounds; it is a blow to a feeling of being connected, attached, loved, protected and cared for which are reasons why we seek romantic love, to begin with. When this connection is shattered or even shaken, a predictable negative cycle of attack-defense usually sets in which leads many couples to feelings of helplessness, hopelessness, and tears at the very fabric of love. Many relationships do not survive this trauma.

If you and your partner are stuck in this cycle, consider seeking professional help to help you navigate the tear in your relationship and, maybe, get to a place of repair.

Below I would showcase the importance of honesty in a relationship;
Let’s start with the first reason. Honesty builds trust. When we are honest with one another we learn to trust. We don’t have to wonder what is being hidden or kept secret. Naturally we are at ease in our gut because we know the other person cares enough to tell us the truth.

Honesty doesn’t always feel good at the time but we can appreciate it because the person being honest is being vulnerable. They are taking a chance at trusting you with the truth. These people understand that what they could say, has the potential to hurt the relationship. However, they care about you and want a relationship that is built on the truth.

When a relationship is built on truth it opens the door for growth. Which leads me into the second reason to why honesty is a big deal in relationships. Honesty problem solves.
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Anyone who has a successful relationship knows this to be true. When we are in a relationship where two people are allowed to be honest, it gives the relationship a chance to solve problems that come up. Sometimes misunderstandings happen. When we are honest we can work through the misunderstanding, communicate and solve the issue and be done with it. Different perspectives can be frustrating. However, we are all different in our views and can learn how the other person thinks. Honesty grows the mind and heart.

The third reason honesty is important in relationships is that honesty grows our character. When we are honest we are holding people accountable for their behavior. It challenges us and encourages us to be a better human being. We become a person that thinks about our choices and how they can help or hurt the relationship and the person we care about.

Honesty gives understanding. This is so important because it will all around help us understand our past, present and future. When we give honesty it doesn’t necessarily reap understanding right away. But when we have enough people telling us the truth it can be a great place to land. From this place we can begin to understand the situation, who we are and what needs to happen to grow each part of our life.
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Honesty gives us freedom. We are free to be ourselves, when we find ourselves in relationships were we can be honest. We don’t have to worry about working hard to be accepted or appreciated for who we are. Everything is talked about and shared because we care. We don’t have to secretly wonder if the other is annoyed or frustrated because we know they care about us enough to be honest with how they feel about us.
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Honesty teaches us. It teaches us many great lessons. It teaches us how to interact with people and choose our words wisely. Think about it, when a little kid you know says something with an honest heart and it comes out as an insult. They aren’t trying to be mean, well most of them aren’t. They just say the truth without thinking about how their words are going to effect the other.
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The more we practice honesty, the more we learn how to be honest and use modesty with our words. We learn through experiences good and bad with those in our lives what honest words are effective in helping us to grow.

Honesty demonstrates genuine love. Healthy and wholesome families know this to be true. When you love a person, you want to protect them from the evils of the world. We live in a world that isn’t always kind. Some people (any one who is reading this I bet can think of at least one, probably more) seek pleasure at someone else’s expense. Those that love best are super honest because seeing them hurt and damaged is the last thing they want for them.

We have seen from all I said how important Honesty is in our relationship..

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