Get to know each other before talking

We should understand that thousands of people in the world are different, and their difference lies in their different interests. If we can carefully study and explore the differences between people, we will be able to easily turn them into resources for us to use through conversation.

Because they are also part or all of human life, they are necessary things in the scope of human nature, whether it is what human beings say, think, do, or everything else, including personal temperament, hobbies, opinions, and prejudice, all fall within the scope of human nature.

At the beginning of the 20th century, at a banquet, Roosevelt, who had just returned from abroad and was preparing to take part in the 1912 presidential election, saw many strangers. Of course, these people must know him as a big man, but because of the difference in status and status, their attitude towards him is very dull.

Roosevelt saw that the strangers at the banquet didn't mean to be friendly to him, so he approached the ear of Mr. Lu Si Watt sitting next to him and whispered, "Lu Si Watt, please tell me a little about all the guests sitting opposite me." Therefore, Dr. Lu Si Watt gave a brief introduction to the personalities and characteristics of those people.

Through Dr. Lu Si Watt's explanation, Roosevelt had a rough understanding of people who had never met before, including what they were most proud of, what they had done, and what they liked.

Next, Roosevelt prepared practical conversation for everyone and fully communicated with these strangers. From this, it is not difficult to see how clever Roosevelt's communication skills are. He took the trouble to find out the general situation of people he had never met in advance, just to win their conviction.

However, in this way, his conversation immediately aroused the interest of those present, making them feel that Roosevelt was approachable and had a favorable impression on him unconsciously. The famous journalist Macpherson once said:

For everyone who came to see himself, Roosevelt had known everything about them before they came in. Roosevelt knew that most people have some conceits. Therefore, he expressed his admiration and admiration to them, and made them feel that they knew everything about them and remembered them in mind. This is the only way to win each other's favor.

Among the many strategies, the simplest one is to make the other party feel that we have enough knowledge of the things that interest them and are closely related to them. Great leaders often use this simple and important strategy.
Of course, everyone is different. When using this kind of strategy, we should also vary from person to person and adopt different strategies for different people.

Someone once compared the space where we live and the living range of human beings to "the playground of human beings", which is really an interesting metaphor. What makes outstanding people outstanding is that they can turn people they have never met into their own friends and supporters.

However, the source of those new friends is that they actively devote themselves to "human playground" in order to meet people with different personalities and interests. When he first became the leader of American steel company, he felt unprecedented pressure, because his colleagues not only didn't support him, but were embarrassed with him everywhere, which made him very passive at work.

Kale felt that this situation could not continue any longer, and he decided to take the initiative to solve this problem. He felt that he should first explore the reasons for his unpopularity, then cultivate feelings with his colleagues, and then get their full cooperation to make the company's business flourish.

How did Kale solve this problem? In fact, it is not complicated to say. In his letters to colleagues about business, Caleb often interspersed with some personal conversations.

In each letter, he attached one or two lines of things related to the recipients' preferences, or the things they were most looking forward to, or greeted their family and friends, or recalled the situation during the last meeting with them.

Caleb's strategy was a great success, and finally he made impressive achievements in his career. In fact, we only need to adopt some very simple methods to make the other party feel that we care about him, but the effect of this strategy is often very surprising.

To sum up, if we want to get the acceptance and cooperation of others, we must know each other's interests and personal hobbies in advance. We should always keep in mind the names, hobbies and habits of others, the things they have done and the people they admire, even including what they lack or need.

We must show others that we have the same concern for the things they are interested in. At the same time, let the other party know that they already know a little about this knowledge and attach great importance to it.

For those who are particularly important, or people with special personalities, we should know their preferences in advance, or try our best to attract the attention of the other party. When dealing with events in a group or a region, we should always show our respect for their customs and habits, and be willing to learn one or two local customs and habits, so that we can personally show our respect.