Ulog #19: Time for a Break

I keep getting overwhelmed by the "obligations" (that I've mostly put upon myself) with steemit. I find discord to be completely and utterly anxiety ridden anymore. Just clicking on the page to open it makes my heart race because... who the hell knows? In part because the thought that I will need to find some sort of social energy to participate and even just read all of the notifications. In part because I sit there and watch chats happening and I just don't get it. I don't have anything to say, I don't get small talk and I just feel lost... but at the same time, I feel like I SHOULD participate... it's quite ridiculous, I realize. I mean, no one else is trying to put these responsibilities on me, but I feel like I've joined groups that are all ABOUT interaction and I'm not interacting!

For a while I was fine, because I was really good about interacting on posts. Making meaningful comments/interactions on posts is much more my speed. Lately, however, even that thought has been stressful.

I think part of it is that I'm trying SO hard to get other website stuff done and that has been a headache, to say the least. i'm not a techie sort and it has been just a clusterfuck of chaos far too often, leaving me feeling stressed instead of successful day in and day out.

I also have the problem of being in a somewhat manic state lately and that makes it incredibly difficult for me to keep my attention on one thing. Adding in social media and extra interaction on top of trying to write and work on website stuff is just too much.

Soooo... I finally thought, "Yo, Byn, you don't HAVE to keep up every damn day. Take a BREAK." and I just immediately calmed. Well, no, I immediately argued and fussed about it for a while... but THEN I thought it sounded nice. Even if I had a 'real' job, I would take time off occasionally. So that's what I'm doing. I'm taking a week off.

These photos are from when we lived on the sailboat in the Bahamas. My favorite thing about the boat life was the view and the seclusion (MOST of the time) that was so easy to find. It was also a little difficult at times, because we were living on a 40 ft boat with 6 people... but there were so many uninhabited islands, that quite often I could go to shore by myself and just BE.

Abyni started school this week so I will pretty much have my afternoons to myself (other than when my other kids stop by to visit). So I am going to take this week to delve into JUST writing and working on my website. That's it. I'm going to get off of facebook, steemit and discord and get shit done around the house and with my writing.

I hope to be back in about a week with a working wordpress site that I can use to crosspost to steemit... AND hopefully a mostly finished book of short stories, including several brand new never-seen-before stories!

Short Stories

A fun series: Letters froma Boat Cat!

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My most recent short story done in AUDIO!

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