I left my first (and still only) love, bc I wanted to live abroad. This was the last letter I wrote him:

in writing •  8 years ago 


I left my home, my friends, my relationship,…, everything I knew, and went for different life abroad. In a city I didn't even know back then.
I don't regret it. But I did have some overwhelming moments of loneliness, just as much I had moments of excitement.
Just found this back in my diary from back then, it's the most true expression of how I felt at the time:

I'm meeting a new future
Following a path I do not know
I'm choosing the uncertainty
Above the loved ones I leave at home

Baby you don't have to
Don't have to understand
Cause all of this is selfish
And you're a better man

But I hope that someday
Somehow you will see
That this is who I am
A girl chasing futures she hopes to meet

And maybe I will never
And look for ruins of our past
But than I'll count it as a blessing
That the moments we had will always last.

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Love vs Abroad @futureunknown !?

I was more scared of always wondering 'what if;;;' than I was scared of losing what I already had.
I was just out of college, and obviously didn't look around to actually see everything.
But then again, leaving like that made me realise that I should always look around and not only focus on only looking ahead!