My father died from his alcoholism. For many years, I've never touched the stuff. As I've become older, I've learned to enjoy good beer, whiskey, wine. But, no matter what, I just can't bring myself to abuse it. Too many memories of my father including bad smells. I can smell vodka today and get a bit grossed out by it. Anyway, good luck. Life is about balance and moderation. You can do it.