An Ode to My Avatar (Comedy Open Mic #7)

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Hey Nameless. Yes, I don’t even know your name but from the very first time I saw you among the results of a search engine, I knew you were perfect. Thou captured and radiated every bit of who I actually am: cold, dark yet good. Except one thing though: my sex.

I blame not your creator for such biased delegation of everything holy to a female cartoon. Or better still for skipping making a male version. Or maybe he did but the World Association of United Search Engines refused to grant my perfect wish in bid to remind me once more that my heart desires will continue to be short-met? I remain still though; in a determined stance of minting no blame to any cause.

Maybe it was never meant to be in the first place, a subtle message the powers greater than yours truly tried to interpret to him through different subtleties and languages.

It was past time. Every nigga meeting me on discord like I am some hot chick. The curious, the rude and the plain stupid.

COMMERCIAL BREAK!

I hearby confess onto the soul of all dames I have once trolled in one way or the other in this life or my past lives and the future when I might go drunk and talk trash once more. If what I faced in these past few weeks remotes close to what you girls face in a life time, then this once annoying feminists movements aren’t annoying enough. Forgive me pinkies for I have sinned!

END OF

Ahem. We back like we never left. The struggles continued. “fellow” discord females beefing me on discord channels for being too hot, having no knowledge of the holy rod that resides in my pants nor the testosterone running marathon in my sacks.

_{*pic taken down. tongues out}

Even my game got obliterated. Toasting went dry for me. Chief of which was when I almost scored @diebitch. I cried for 3 days. Which says a lot given I haven’t shed a tear since the church started commemorating the passing of the Lord.

I can’t do this anymore Avy. I am letting you go. They don’t appreciate you for who you are nor do they to me for who I am anymore. Too confusing to function well, to concentrate and be myself

It was silent fun these past weeks but now we go for a change.

I will always remember you like my first love. Till EOS do us apart, I remain your one and only holy set of branches.

I have till post payout day to lay you to a final rest. I better get to work right now.

Peace.