It sounds to me you are frustrated and are looking for a quick fix in life. Let me tell you that overall wellness is not a quick fix! If you are looking for motivation then you are not going to get it by just THINKING it. You need to have an actual plan and DO it. It is actually not hard, you are just not going to see instant results. Start with a gradual change, cut out bread and carbs, then go to the gym! If you spent as much thought out in what you did in the blog I am sure results would come in. You identified your source of unhappiness, only you can take control of that!