Life of a Jobless: What Happen to ME after losing a job?

I lost my job two weeks ago and believe me it still so hard to think about it. I’m thankful to all of you guys, who shared their encouragement that made myself calm. Yes, those nice words are all effective it does work something in me and I really appreciate it.

Given those encouraging words, I could not hide the fact that behind the back of my mind, I still have these worries and anxieties of how a jobless can make it out of the day. This is not the first time that I lost job. I had this experience 13 years ago where I also lost my first job but what happen lately was different. Its more painful maybe because on the first incident, I was at my young age.

I found these following reasons why:

The first job was an appointment coming from a person who knew me personally and that trusted me her office. Which means that I have not exerted too much effort to grow because I already have the trust of the boss. But that doesn’t mean that I did not do my best in performing my job. In fact, when we started, it was me and my boss and after a months and years we have grown tremendously.

On the second job lost was different, Why? Because I spent so much time and effort to have the job. I applied to it and run through the process of application with so much interviews and examination. Not to mention the long process of orientation that took me 2 weeks to finish. According to some, it was the first time that the company did that extensive orientation to its new employees, and it was only done on that batch and never had happen on the future batches.

It is something worth it. I have so much growth in that company resulting from my diligence and knowledge on the type of business that they run to. I never start big and I did not applied to be a branch head. I applied on the lowest position in the office.

Third reason could be that its because I know it's hard to look for a job nowadays. Landing a good job is not easy.

Career Growth

I started in the company as a Credit Officer. As a credit officer my function is to look for potential clients, a position that requires so much field work. I spent my days walking down the streets, visiting different kind of people, moving around from one end of the city to the other end. This is the picture of my duty, and this happens everyday from Monday to Saturday.

What I had in my mind back then is that I will show the company that hiring me was not a mistake. With the help of God, I succeeded. I was able to clients in the company drive in millions of revenue.

The company then decided to open another branch somewhere in Lanao del Norte, in a municipality named Maigo. My superior had me assigned in the newly opened branch not as a credit officer anymore but as a credit supervisor. I took step twice in the ladder since the next step to credit officer is senior credit officer. This time, I will be leading the credit officers of the branch in attaining the goals of the company.

Fast forward, after 6 months, I was promoted to be the Branch Head of the office. The growth I had in that company took me only a year. It’s indeed a blessing for me and my family and I thank God for that.

These might be the reasons why it was so hard for me to loss that job. The management explained to me their reason which I clearly understand. They made sure that the retrenchment was not a result of poor performance (I make a post for that in the future).

What Happen to me?

There are few changes on the emotional aspect of my personality. I had these changes after the incident of losing my job. These changes made me feel sick because I don’t like it. It is something negative and should not be tolerated but I find myself having hard times controlling it. I admit, I fall for it, I could not help myself. These anxieties made me worry a lot because I have a family of 5 that I need to feed everyday.

• I felt pain that I don’t understand.
• I easily get angry even in little things.
• I get irritated in simple conversation.

This is not me. My wife had noticed it also and I know my kids felt the same, maybe they just don’t have the courage to tell me but I do felt it.

I need to free myself from this chain, I have to. I thought I was strong enough to handle this kind of situation, I hope I was. Hope I can find a way.