All my life I have had a problem relating with other people, especially talking in front of a group of people. I remember when I was in second grade my class had a project of a city with buildings, parks, cars, people, we had a huge cardboard base and houses and buildings were made out of all size boxes. We had to make a presentation to I think third and fourth grade. Well I was sure I didn't want to be the presenter so I made everyone know I was out of that job, of course they all voted for me to do it, the rat bastards, even my best friend.
Well, the joke was on them because when the time came for the presentation I just got tongue tied and couldn't say a word I thought I was going to have a heart attack, of course it was just panic. So our teacher just made the presentation herself. I learnt a great lesson that day, never say you vehemently don't want to do something that is going to be decided by a vote, it just makes the voters notice you. No, the best thing to do is lie low and make yourself a part of the landscape and maybe you won't be noticed.
Well, I was seven back then, but that stage fright has never abandoned me, there is nothing I hate as much as talking in public and there is nothing I can do about it. And talking in public is a money maker, I have known people who make a great living just giving talks about subjects that have absolutely no value and are forgotten as soon as the speaker leaves, but that is how these guys make their living, talking.
And yet when I am talking with a group of friends I can talk my mouth off and make all of them laugh so I think its not so much fear of crowds its fear of strangers, there must be some scientific name for this and I am quite sure the word syndrome is included in that name.
Well I got that off my chest, writing on crypto social media was at first scary for me because I didn't know who might read what I wrote, after six years I have improved greatly, not my writing that is still lousy, but now I don't care who reads what I write or what they think of it. I put two nice tropical pictures of Honduras, which I can tell you is a beautiful country, they are just to relax, nothing special about them.
I enjoyed reading this. I can relate to what you shared with us. I´m a little bit like that but not so much. I´ve learnt to be more social as I have got older. As I child I had a little of the same sensation in school. I´m not an introvert but big crowds of people or parties make me uncomfortable, I prefer smaller gatherings. Thank you for sharing. PS.. I think art has helped me to find a way to relate to the world.
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It is interesting the experience of speak up in front of others and just with even a small group of people that was my problem too when I was a child. I am glad that many of us with the time overcome that and find the freedom and ability to be able to speak up and enjoy it. Enjoyed reading your post :)
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When we say something we don't want very determinedly, it draws attention and the eyes are on us. You are so right about this. You already said the solution is to act relaxed as a part of the moment.
Those who do not like to talk in front of strangers can be good observers. This is why they are more likely to be successful in writing. Writing can also be your magic power. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings heartfeltly :)
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