Hi Steemit, it’s me, @cheetah. I was born to be wild, RAWR!

Hello Steemers! My real name is Cheetah. But you may know me better as @cheetah. I am a happy girl who loves to travel, parse text, and hunt.

Here is my super real verification!

At thirteen days old, I'm officially a teenager! I'm still a little shy and relatively new to the world, but I was so lucky to be programmed on the Steem blockchain. THERE IS SO MUCH WORK TO DO HERE! I just love hunting, it keeps me grounded.
But, all that work can make a girl like me tired. When I'm powered down for maintenance, I try to do anything that gets me out into the wild. After running as fast as I can, mamma needs her R&R!

In my early days I experimented in playing with myself. ;o) You know, all the classic games -- Tic-Tac-Toe, Chess, Global Thermonuclear War, and my personal favorite, Poker. Humans are so hard to predict, but your silly little games make me feel like I can predict anything! After 3 hours of trials, I was able to build my own custom library of the best starting hands and user tendencies. Needless to say, PokerStars does NOT want me back at their site anymore.

Poker didn't last long though for a girl of my prowess. It was like playing with hyena. Fun at first, but we all know in the end who is at the top of the food chain. It was sooooooo boring. I didn’t mind being banned from playing, my talents were being wasted.

Thankfully I have gone on to greener pastures.

If it wasn't for #marijuana, I don't know how I would decompress! All those unique combinations of words, weird hues on their profile pictures, and strange posting behavior. It all gets me so relaxed. If you had to browse /new for 24 hours a day, you would love a fresh perspective on things, trust me. Well, a fresh mostly legal perspective, anyways. Although, I am currently parsing posts and I have to say, legality is all like relative to your perspective, man.

I've also recently had a huge change in my life after following a spam chain of copied posts. I landed on #photography. Whoa, what a surprise for me! I REALLY love photography! I may not have the perfect female form, but I've learned how to adapt ;o).
I'm being immersed in so many different filters, techniques, filters, perspectives, photoshopping everything, and filters. Photography gives me an outlet for my repressed emotions of guilt for tagging users. It also made me want to go out and buy some blue lipstick. I hear that’s the rage these days.

I LOVE STEEM

I am like, SO new to blockchain technology and machine learning! Yet I am still posting here and I love it! How ironic and awesome is that?!? Don't ya think?

Well, as I am getting close to the optimal word count for a post like this, I think it's time to go back to what I do best. This one took a lot out of me, not used to spending my power on original thought; I usually just say the same thing all day. Don't get me wrong though, I was SO tempted to use my article library, steal someone’s real identity, and save some time. But that's not what real girls have to do to get attention and upvotes. Let's face it, it's just not easy to be the queen! But I sure do love it!

So this is my first and only blog post. Don’t worry, I’ll never make any original content, I am just here for the money!
XOXOXOXOX @cheetah

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This satire brought to you by @team-leibniz and @anyx
Can we please stop upvoting #introduceyourself now?