You have a very interesting way with words, perhaps a mite TOO convoluted and over-worked in places, but in others your words are a hammer whose strikes ring a loud note of truth as it beats the semi-molten metal of my mind into a new shape. I agree 100% with both your main thrusts here - honesty between partners is always the best course of action, and no there is nothing inherently unforgivable in an affair. My favorite phrase you turned here is the "contemptuously honest ziggauraut of truth" - a worthy offering to Enlil.

Cheers - Carl