This is very touching and my prayer is that you can move forward: I gained some very few friends. I also lost most of them. I have no regrets about losing new people in my life. It is easier now more than ever to let go of those who consume my mental energy. It was hard living with them as we were not at the same wavelength. Nothing's wrong with them, it was just the wrong crowd for me. And worse, to even live with to begin with. Most of them didn't have any goals in life or anything. Most of them were just drinking away. At some point, I was even sexually harassed - verbally by some insecure guy in the neighborhood also competing for attention. I stood up for myself and fought, but in the end, I was the crazy one. It took one bad situation to know the real ones. I didn't have any allies. Not everyone was true, oh big surprise! I couldn't win this. It was better to leave.