Inadequate. You ever felt that way? I have.
One feeling of inadequacy: I remember meeting an ex-girlfriend for lunch at a local Ruby Tuesday, a restaurant that had been one of our favorite restaurants to eat and always enjoyed have a relaxing time together.
After ordering, she had me go to the salad bar to fix our salad, which was the routine we had in the past. Up at the salad bar, this feeling of inadequacy came over me, because it had been a year or more, at the time, since we had had lunch together. And here I was, building the salad, feeling lost and the inability to build the salad as she had always liked her salad. I admit, I struggled.
Another time of having that feeling, one employer had previously pulled his business off the market before he had hired me. The employer had his business on the market for a $1 million. His business started tanking, because of irresponsible management that he had hired to run his business.
The employer and I, even though we were competitors, we had become friends. I also helped him with a few issues, as a friend, and eventually, one day, he asked me to work for him, managing his business and bringing it back up to where it was before he pulled it off the market.
It seemed like over a month that he pursued me. One of the things I told him, "I may not be the person he needed." He assured me that I was. His wife even asked to meet with me, and in the meeting, encouraged me to work for her husband.
I finally made the decision, gave my notice to my employer at the time, and went to work for this individual, trying to help restore his business back.
A huge responsibility, but the type of responsibilities that I liked having. Someone that had a "real" need; an employer that needed an employee, to fill more than just a slot.
An employer that wanted an employee that could take the helm, command the sails, position the rudder, so that the direction would be "true". In order for the business to come out of its course of destruction, and become competitive and prosperous again.
With work, we were able to take his business, that he once had on the market for $1 million, and tanked so low that he couldn't even have sold it for a tenth of that, was able to put it back on the market, selling it after 23 months of my hire, for nearly three-quarter of a Mil.
The employer had vultures that were waiting for him to fold so that they could pick up the business for pennies on the dollars.
He was able to clear his debt on what he owed on the business, after selling it for twice his debt.
But the story is, no matter how many times I had done similar achievements for other past employers, is that each time I worked for a new employer, it's still a "brand new" feeling of inadequacy.
I remember when my first child was born, it was a renewed feeling of responsibility. Going from being just a husband, to now being a father. And each new child born was a brand new feeling of responsibility.
When my firstborn started elementary school, again, a renewed feeling of responsibility, and then Jr high, then High school. Each time, it was a renewal of inadequacy, that had to be confronted, and another opportunity to confront the challenge.
Life is full of those feelings of feeling inadequate. But it is like taking that first step as a child, or an adult that is having to learn to walk again. It is taking that courage within each of us, and overcoming each new challenge.
The monsters are as big as we make them be.
One of the movies that come to mind, is the movie "The Thirteenth Warrior" (1999) with Antonio Banderas. They were being attacked by what they considered to be an "Ancient Evil". But realized later, that what they were being attacked by, were nothing more than just men.
And realizing that, gave them the courage to overcome.
Each feeling of inadequacy is a good thing because it helps to keep you grounded, and realizing that we are only human.
Where we overcome that feeling of inadequacy, is by stepping up, accepting the challenge, and embracing that feeling, allowing it to "teach you" and "be your friend"