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Mindful Moment #5

Happy 2020 Steemians! As we’re starting a fresh new year there's no shortage of new year’s resolutions on social media.

It’s perfectly natural to want to improve our level of happiness and quality of life and most of us are looking for actionable ways to experience a better life with the least amount of effort. This is the essence of what this Mindful Moments Series is all about.

Are you bad at remembering people’s names when you first meet them? I can sometimes be too. If you find yourself struggling to remember someone’s name after first meeting them it’s a good indicator that you’re “listening to reply” instead of “listening to understand.”

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“The biggest communication problem is we don’t listen to understand, we listen to reply.”

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Communication is the key to all human relationships and if who you’re speaking with feels they’re not being heard then you’re not really connecting with them. In fact you’re doing them, and yourself, a disservice. This can make them feel slighted and unimportant even if that wasn’t your intention. Think of how frustrating it is when you feel the person you’re speaking to isn’t listening to what you have to say.

In the English language the words listen and silent contain the exact same letters and I like to think it’s no coincidence. To listen deeply we must first quiet our minds and set aside our egos. There’s no need to prove to anyone how much we know or try to “one up” an experience they’re telling us about. When we’re not speaking and someone else is, it’s our job to listen deeply. Being a good listener will leave most people with a much better impression than anything else you could say or do.

Life changes drastically when you begin to truly, Listen to Understand. Not only will those people you’re communicating with feel heard but you will gain a much deeper understanding of the kind of person they really are. Deep listening takes practice but once you master it, people will feel a stronger connection with you and vice versa. It will upgrade your personal and professional relationships more than you can believe.

Also, you will learn more from listening than you can imagine. Most people are fascinating in some way, shape, or form. I like to say, “All the world’s a library, and each person a book.” This universe is trying its best to teach us all the lessons we're meant to learn and some of those lessons are being taught through others so it's very important to be present. Try your best not to miss any of those lessons.

An Experiment

A good trick to remind yourself of this is make a custom wallpaper and save it to the lock screen of your phone. The background can be any color but I ask you to type one single word….LISTEN. We all look at our phones probably a hundred times a day so seeing this word repeatedly will subconsciously burn it into your brain.

Here’s mine…

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Locking In What You’ve Learned

This simple meditation will help to solidify the intention of becoming a better listener.

Find a quiet place. Sit upright in a comfortable chair with your eyes closed and concentrate on your breath for a count of thirty.

Meditation

1. Inhale for a count of 5 through your nose. Imagine listening to someone. Instead of words, a golden healing light is emanating from them as they speak;
2. Hold the breath for a count of 5. Absorb this light and lock it inside of you;
3. Exhale for a count of 5 through your mouth. Envision the light being exhaled and filling the room you’re in; and
   Repeat for as long as you like (at least 3 repetitions).

After you practice this very simple meditation technique for even a few minutes it’s very helpful to linger in that place of peace and calm, focusing your mind on becoming a better listener for both yourself and those around you.

Did you miss previous installments of the Mindful Moments Series? If so, you can find them here: 1 - Two Week Media Fast, 2 - Worry and Fear, 3 - Setting Boundaries, and 4. - Self Care.

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If you're enjoying this series and want to experience what meditation has to offer please consider picking up a copy of my book, The Perfect Pause, on Amazon.

Happy New Year everyone! I wish you all a peaceful, prosperous, and healthy 2020!

Tomorrow we're escaping the ice and snow of Minnesota for a bit to soak up the sun in St. Thomas. I look forward to sharing our Caribbean adventures with you soon!

In Gratitude,

~ Eric Vance Walton ~

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*I am an American novelist, poet, traveler, and crypto-enthusiast. If you’ve enjoyed my work please sign up for my author newsletter at my website. Newsletter subscribers will receive exclusive updates and special offers and your information will never be sold or shared.

Alarm Clock Dawn, one of the first full length novels published on the blockchain, and the book that started it all for me can be found HERE. Or Click Here to read it for free on the Steemit blockchain

My meditation book, The Perfect Pause, is priced at $12.99 (paperback) and $4.99 (eBook). Buy the paperback and receive the eBook for free!

Let’s Keep In Touch

www.ericvancewalton.net