Why I Stopped Being a Conspiracy Theorist

wakeupsheeps (57) · 7 years ago (edited)

Since I started actively posting 2 weeks ago, I have been having a crisis of self. Up until the day I started on steemit, I was a conspiracy investigator. Listening to pundits, chasing the days news, getting ahead of everyone else while getting nowhere.

I allowed massive bull markets to pass me by because collapse was around the corner. It's still around the corner but I'm done playing the smart prepper. I'm going to take part in this crypto coin boon and play a part in society.

Nobody cares that your government wants you dead, or at least impaired. Guess what? I don't care anymore either.

I'm quitting the conspiracy world. I already know how evil the powers that be are. They are evil. Seth Rich's murder investigation, or lack there of, is all you really need to see.

It's time to live life.

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7 votes

clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

Exactly. Chasing their demons is just another way for them to win, because we are wasting our lives trying to be like them to beat them instead of approaching it from the other direction.

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5 votes

wakeupsheeps (57) · 7 years ago

Super well said.

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fairz (59) · 7 years ago

massive government corruption .but now we have internet and people are waking up to the lies when everyones woken up and ready we go kick there arses and them scum bankers .i no what your saying tho dont get to caught in the web

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wakeupsheeps (57) · 7 years ago

It's all about the banks....

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bilbop (53) · 7 years ago

People are easily swayed to negativity, just look at the 'programming' from the 'news'. Conditioned to it we are. And you are right @clayboyn, people will learn by experiencing positive examples. Our world needs lots more folks doing positive acts, leading by example.
"Avoid throwing bricks at a crumbling building, save the bricks to build a new structure based on a positive dynamic".- Tio Andy, Cherokee Medicine Man.

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3 votes

clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

@bilbop always dropping some knowledge. <3

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bilbop (53) · 7 years ago

Thanks @clayboyn Seem as though we are on the synchronous positivity frequency :-)
And steeming on.

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battleaxe (69) · 7 years ago

right on

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bilbop (53) · 7 years ago

Indeed and in deed, thanks @battleaxe

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burgundiilane (42) · 7 years ago

Love this piece. Have come across a few individuals in my life like this who were conspiracy theorists , and i honestly try to avoid any conversations other than simple pleasantries like hello, how are. How would you suggest i allow myself to respond to someone like this without feeling the weight of negativity and just wanting to run away?

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clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

Honestly, I would just say do what makes you happy and if talking to them doesn't make you happy, then don't. I had to cut a lot of ties personally, but it was worth it.

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notoriousdjp (56) · 7 years ago

Don't focus on attacking the individual or individuals in their lie. All you need to do is expose it for what it is and then like the wise Goldbloom says:

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8 votes

theblindsquirl (57) · 7 years ago

He also says, "Change your apartment, change the world."

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bbrewer (58) · 7 years ago

I am going through a similar process. I was waiting and waiting for really bad things to happen so that I could prove I knew what was up. It was making me miserable. Since I have moved on I have enjoyed my life as it is a lot more. Great post. Thanks for sharing.

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5 votes

reiki-trail (65) · 7 years ago

Excellent post @clayboyn. Thank you for sharing your process of growth, acceptance and conscious use of your personal power with us.

My life experience has also taught me to stay centered in love to most effectively maintain my creative abilities. In doing so, I am better able to harness my will instead of allowing it to be hijacked by any person(s), place(s) or things.

Thank you as always! Namaste

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clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

:) Thanks. Controlling and accepting responsibility for our own energetic presence is the first step to having the impact we desire. Namaste.

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reiki-trail (65) · 7 years ago

Yessss..... :)

Namaste

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whatamidoing (69) · 7 years ago

I think it's just a matter of doing on what you can do and feeling positive about it. The problem with digging too deep for truth and meaning in the corrupt nonsense is that it usually goes hand in hand with being alarmist and negative, which only really adds to the problem. I do appreciate people out searching for truth but I hope they can find peace in the good things they are doing, rather than dwell in the negativity of that which they are trying to expose.

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4 votes

clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

Some shit doesn't have a positive side. Pizza and murder are hard to justify.

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4 votes

whatamidoing (69) · 7 years ago

I don't mean feeling positive about what's going on, I mean feeling positive about what you are doing about it. If you can't feel positive about your efforts to expose crap and at peace with the universe, you probably have another calling ;-)

clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

I get it, and unfortunately from what I've seen, you clear out one shit factory and another one opens down the street.

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whatamidoing (69) · 7 years ago

hahahaha are the shit factories making the conspiracy theories or the conspiracies? Do you no longer believe any of that stuff is happening or do you just think it's not worth focusing your energy on?

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clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

Net impact. I'm not blind, I just stopped having selective vision.

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aggroed (78) · 7 years ago

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richardcrill (67) · 7 years ago

Nowadays I'll still drop some truth, but if I can see it's not being accepted, I'll plant a seed in hopes that it takes root and move on. But yeah, focusing on creating something positive is usually energy spent better than fighting the negative.

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3 votes

clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

It certainly seems to make me happier focusing on the positive approach. Thanks for sharing!

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paradise-found (69) · 7 years ago

Agreed!!

paradise-found (69) · 7 years ago (edited)

Most sheep love the lies, so I don't waste my time on them anymore.
I've come to this conclusion, "nothing is as it seems."
And I'm happy knowing that I'm prepared, come hell or high water.
Congratulations @clayboyn and Steem on !!

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sacred-agent (61) · 7 years ago (edited)

@clayboyn THANK You Very much 4 this post... I'm guilty of the same thinking and doing my best to change my perspective to focus on the Positive !!

UpVoted, Following from almost my very 1st day

Have a Great Weekend !!

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clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

:) We all have our own paths, I just chose to change the one that I was on.

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sacred-agent (61) · 7 years ago

@clayboyn Just ReSteemed... I believe our thoughts are Much More powerful than most of us will ever realize or fully understand... Thanks Again !!

redgaruda (46) · 7 years ago

Resonates with me, upvoted and followed!

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max-float (30) · 7 years ago

Come and invite the Holy Spirit in your life. Let His truth guide you to shine light upon your neighbours. Never stop fighting for truth.

numpypython (67) · 7 years ago

Beautifully written, @clayboyn. It's a Hindu concept and i'm paraphrasing but the entire world / universe exists within our minds. We create the life we wish to lead.

clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

I resonate with that. Thanks for sharing!

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orenshani7 (64) · 7 years ago

"No amount of darkness can fight darkness, but it takes only a small light to chase darkness away".

Applowed, upvoted and resteemed.

clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

Thanks for the support!

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shellany (59) · 7 years ago

Good read, for some it may apply: "Ignorance is bliss." If well-being is at stake then it's time to stop and examine oneself. I admire your advocacy for positivity to lead a better life. You can still help others in so many ways. Kudos!

icanrant (42) · 7 years ago

so ive got a question for you.... obviously youve been down some rabbit holes and you know some shit so let me ask you what the right thing to do is....

if you are having a conversation with a person and they repeatedly use a word or something incorrectly in a way that may not be obvious to everybody but is undeniably, categorically incorrect....
what is the right thing to do, correct them- or not?

what if all of your friends are jumping off a bridge or a cliff? do you?

im not judging im actually with you most ofthe way but bottom line for me is there truly is a spiritual war taking place (im not religious) and i cant unlearn the things ive learned.

As such, I now refrain from sharing my opinion where it wont be cared for butstill care to understand what is really going on. idk

clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

I'll answer it the best way I know how. Right and wrong will both always exist. If you whiped out every evil you could find, you would still be finding more evil. One does not exist without the other because they are in essence the same thing from different perspectives. You have to know what you believe to be right and accept that you knowing it is right can't make someone else not know that it is wrong. Hopefully that makes sense.

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icanrant (42) · 7 years ago

yeh grey jedi duality type shit i feel u bru.

okay so fucking/murdering babies and joking about it might not be wrong? or is it more about the fact so long as you push with good you will create a reality of bad or light/dark or however one wants to word it?

because the satanic shit obviously already exists so is it more about accepting the reality of the world and moving on?

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clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

Since you brought up the Jedi, one of my favorite philosophical references, think about the difference between them and the Sith. Sith want to destroy and eradicate while Jedi search for balance. Do you want to destroy or find balance?

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icanrant (42) · 7 years ago

see i love star wars and grew upwatching them literally every day. i would choose jedi every time but unfortunately in that realm the grey jedi are the path of balance and the jedi somehow are a chicken/egg relationship with the sith. and only by not interfering can balance be achieved....

but if we exist in a reality where the fuckery takes place, can we really achieve balance by sitting idly by?

i only argue so hard because im pretty sure taking your approach is where im gonna end up lol

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clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago (edited)

:) It's not an argument, we are all trying to find our own understanding. You are right that there are Jedi, which are aligned more to one side which is how I view people hunting and exposing people that they feel are doing wrong. The point is though, if you listen to every time they talk about the force, they are searching for balance. All of those "green" Jedi are just the opposite of "red" Sith. The Grey in the middle is the closest thing to peace that will ever exist in that galaxy far far away. Maybe "peace" only exists in our reality by realizing that both sides are still being destructive towards the other and only when they both stop does peace and harmony exist.

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icanrant (42) · 7 years ago

howdo we get to that point without the truth of things, whatever that may be, coming to light?

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clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

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clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

Truth is a bigger concept than you are making it out to be.

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firepower (79) · 7 years ago

Great post! It's always a good idea to remain positive and spread positivity! :)

clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

I concur, and I'm much happier now than I ever was approaching things from the other way.

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malem (43) · 7 years ago

I find this post to be of great wisdom (y)

albertvhons (64) · 7 years ago

Attacking the negativity doesnt change
Leave them as it be.. Then they will realise soon

Agree..

tonyr (60) · 7 years ago

Great post and great advice @clayborn. Have come to that conclusion myself after a similar realisation. Be the change you wish to see in the world so they say.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts buddy!

clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

Gandhi knew what was up.

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tonyr (60) · 7 years ago

In reference to your most recent post which I have just read, I hear what you are saying! :)

I look forward to seeing what else you have to say my friend.

Thank you for sharing your insight into our human condition! :)

frankbacon (65) · 7 years ago

Imma Theoretical Conspiracist myself.

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clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

:) as long as it makes you happy, do it!

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theblindsquirl (57) · 7 years ago

Congrats on your epiphany.

As the old saying goes,"You can lead a horse to water..."

People will only see the things they're able to handle and many in this world can't handle how much they've been deceived.

Live your life and try to improve the lives of others around you.

That's all we can do.

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clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

Thanks for the support!

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pauljosepharcher (49) · 7 years ago

It's all fun and games until you find out "Men in Black" is based on a true story...

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sandstorm (67) · 7 years ago

Spreading positivity is the answer! Amazing how similar this all sounds brother, and that ain't no damn coincidence.

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clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

Being negative didn't get me very far lol.

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sandstorm (67) · 7 years ago

LOL, yeah, it does that.

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primal-buddhist (55) · 7 years ago

There is a lot to think about here… thank you…

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poppacapp (54) · 7 years ago

Why not do both?

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clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

It doesn't make me happy and if I'm not happy I will never be a strong positive influence on anyone.

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wakeupsheeps (57) · 7 years ago

You can't do both.

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poppacapp (54) · 7 years ago

I can do both.

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wakeupsheeps (57) · 7 years ago

More power to you.

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baah (61) · 7 years ago

The truth that I have found is that we all have so much net impact on the world and how we choose to use that influence determines our own happiness

Principles aren't whimsy feelings. Our own happiness is dependent on numerous things, in fact liars and cheats and thieves derive happiness from that net negative.

The results aren't what I'm expecting and I'm still living in a world of deceit and illusion.

Yeah, we don't always achieve our goals, we don't always succeed in our endeavors, but to conclude that because you didn't succeed and your expectation were not realistic, that you've deceived and are good at it literally makes no sense. Either you deceived or you didn't, alluding to it is weak nonsense, guilting yourself for something as horrible as speaking the truth.

What you have done is admitted that you stuck your head in the sand so as not to somehow give your "energy" over to that side should you peek.

Magical Thinking (also, the Sin of Presumption):: An ancient but deluded fallacy of logos, that when it comes to "crunch time," provided one has enough faith, prays hard enough, says the right words, does the right rituals, "names it and claims it," or "claims the promise," God will always suspend the laws of the universe and work a miracle at the request of or for the benefit of the True Believer. In practice this nihilist fallacy denies the existence of a rational or predictable universe and thus the possibility of any valid argument from logic. See also, Positive Thinking, the Appeal to Heaven, and the Job's Comforter fallacy.

The Positive Thinking Fallacy: An immensely popular but deluded modern fallacy of logos, that because we are "thinking positively" that in itself somehow biases external, objective reality in our favor even before we lift a finger to act. See also, Magical Thinking. Note that this particular fallacy is often part of a much wider closed-minded, sometimes cultish ideology where the practitioner is warned against paying attention to to or even acknowledging the existence of "negative" evidence or counter-arguments against his/her standpoints. In the latter case rational discussion, argument or refutation is most often futile. See also, Deliberate Ignorance.

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clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

At no point did I say I didn't pay attention to it or acknowledge it, I just don't devote my personal energy to infiltration and subterfuge anymore. Assuming why I chose the path I did beyond anything I said in the post is a prime example of why I stopped associating with people that live in a world of deceit and illusion. Cultish ideology of positive thinking versus cultish ideology of feeling like it's my job to go around and play in the mud to prove to the world that dirt exists is just egotistical and deluded. Feel self important if you want to or feel however you want to about my decision, but assuming you have any idea why I couldn't do it anymore is for you to make peace with. I love how this is the reaction that I got from pretty much anyone that knew me before too.

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4 votes

baah (61) · 7 years ago

Exactly what have I assumed about your reasons?
What's that analogy of playing in the mud for? For speaking the truth, that's mud? You don't need to feel like anything about truth, truth doesn't care how you feel, or what your job is. Feel feel feel, you can command me to feel, you're imploring me to "do human".

I not only broke down your arguments on their reason and methods, and you came up with " feel whichever way you want, I just love how everyone that knew me from before REACTED in the same way".

So what are those assumptions you alluded to, what's the analogy for?

And how have you not decidedly stuck your head in the sand so as not to let any negative energy leak out of you, because happiness on the subject of truth?

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clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

The greatest illusion is that truth isn't perspective based or that I give a fuck about your illusions of whatever the fuck your self righteous fuckery is trying to get across right now. Step out of your ego and perhaps we can have an actual conversation :)

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baah (61) · 7 years ago

Why is my ego on center again? and what's this Greatest illusion? What's so difficult about answering a few questions asking clarification, like what assumptions you're talking about, what's the analogy for, and how have you not decidedly stuck your head in the sand so as not to offer the negative side of the paper towel any of your dripping energy? You think that focusing extensively on things that are "positive" will somehow mitigate the effects of negative things or that it would somehow GIVE energy to the negative. Your words:

and have faith that people learn from positive example just as easily as they embrace and adopt fear based existence from negative examples.

MY ego isn't the point of this conversation, nor the "greates illusion", you avoided my points refuting the simplistic notion that "happiness means everything" and the "truth" that happiness is based on how we chose to drip our energy, and you chose negativity and happiness wasn't there, yet the next person chooses negativity and finds pure joy, ecstasy, happiness looks like a turd next to those other feelings, that's no truth, that's "your" truth.

The equally simplistic look at "focusing on the negatives creates negatives" is the fallacy of positive thinking to a t. Yeah all these things exist but I don't care about them because it doesn't make me happy, in which case you have not much principle and just a feelometer that rules your choices. Too bad feelings aren't truth any more than opinions.

Negative bias confirms your feelings very much so, negatives have a serious impact on people compared to positives, it's two sides of the same coin, it doesn't expressly influence more negatives, but negatives affect us more, and not looking at them won't make them disappear any faster, while looking at the positives, spreading positives has a lot less impact than a negative. The crucial point being that one negative will undo many positives in their impact on us, but that's not to say that our only power is to shield ourselves from facing or dealing with the negatives, it's to show that there's a need for a healthier way of dealing with the negatives. If speaking the truth is such an unhappy endeavor then don't do it, but saying

The conclusion that I came to was that I was falling for the illusion myself. I believed that hunting down liars and deceptions through my own lies and deceptions was somehow going to fix the world. I mean, I was pretty good at lying and deception, don't get me wrong, but one amazing source of subterfuge is not going to counteract all of the other deceptions in the world. I also had to consider that I wasn't making anyone happy by telling them that things are actually worse than they perceived them to be.

What does that mean that you were lying to fix the world?
Whats it mean that you were pretty good at lying and deception?

No, it's not your responsibility to counteract all the deceptions in the world, and no, it's not your responsibility to conform people living a lie. First, your responsibility is over yourself, unless you think that someone can be responsible for you. Nobody has responsibility over the world because nobody can claim the world or anyone else without agreement over that, and if you want others to lie to you instead of telling you the truth so as not to feel you bads then you should feel guilty for their reactions, too bad you don't feel much guilt over your reaction outside that o so inviting smilyface to an actual, get that, a REAL conversation, as opposed to the fake, unactual one.

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clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

You see your ego is that thing making you ignore what I've already said. "Feelings" are what you have that make you want to prove you are right and I am wrong. Zero fucks are what I'm giving. Have a great day! Namaste.

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baah (61) · 7 years ago

Yeah I was under the impression some actual conversation could happen when you don't care because the negatives will win, too bad feelings.

Questions, observations and explanations make me right, the pursuit of truth drives me to questions, observations and explanations, feelings is what your whole "discussion" is centers around, only feelings, and faith.

Don't forget to accuse me of assuming, or maybe command me to feel.

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clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

I don't command you to do anything, I said you are free to do as you wish just as you are right now, I'm enjoying you continually proving the point that you are not open to receiving any other perspective but your own. Thus you are not willing to consider that you are the cause of your own feelings of whatever it is that you feel about whatever it is that you feel it about. I'm just going to keep going until you figure that out though, and I don't have anything else to do anymore, I'm not going dig for info to expose anyone, I'll just let them expose themselves, it's much easier.

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baah (61) · 7 years ago

Next you could write "Why I identified as a conspiracy theorist but don't anymore" followed up with "Why I used to be a critical thinker but stopped caring", "How I used to think that happiness was the ultimate motivator and why I switched to love" "Spreading positivity" "Being above the ego", "understanding our feelings" O wait, half of those you'd rip right from here, after you denounce lying and deception only to suggest delusion(yeah, your big revelations about OMG NEEEEEGATIVE! KILL IT WITH LOVE!).

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clayboyn (70) · 7 years ago

LOL, you are hilarious and cute. Have you ever got out from behind the keyboard with your warrioring?

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baah (61) · 7 years ago

You see that think making you ignore what I've already said, it's called the delusional "truth" which cannot be questioned ever, least your whole story built upon its foundation should be compromised.

But more hilariously you asked if I see that which is making me ignore.

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amri (70) · 7 years ago

(y)

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son-of-satire (69) · 7 years ago (edited)

I don't think it's possible to stop being a 'conspiracy theorist' once you are awake to the layers of deception that lie before you. Sure, you can choose not to actively investigate your suspicions, but suppressing them entirely will be quite the task. Once the cat is out the bag, there's not putting it back in- as they say.

I can understand your difficulty in maintaining a level of comfort, especially when looking into the darkest aspects of human existence. But, perhaps changing your direction entirely is not necessary.

You are correct when you say that we only have so much impact that we can make on the world alone. I feel that your problem, and one that I have had myself in the past, is that you are putting too much of the world's problems on your own shoulders.

Many of us have answered that same calling. It can seem as though it is our very purpose to 'awaken' everyone on Earth to the reality of their bondage. But, we soon find that it's not so easy for others to accept the truth, and the task is far more difficult than we had imagined.

This doesn't mean that you should give up. It is good to be well informed, for then you possess the power to better inform those who have been misled. I can't save the fucking world though, and most likely, neither can you. But, maybe that's not our job. Maybe your job is to wake up the person who will go on to wake up the one who will inevitably wake us all up. Perhaps my purpose is to convince you not to stop what you're doing, simply so that you are still able to complete your own.

I don't fucking know. I never will. But, I do know that if we all decide we've had enough of the truth, the world we will wake up in tomorrow will make this one look like heaven.

I think you should keep doing what you are doing. There is a reason you felt so compelled to do it in the first place. because it's something that has to be done.

And one last thing;

I too have spent much time reflecting, wondering whether I am the 'good guy' that I convince myself I am. In the end, I found it to be somewhat redundant.
Who we are is fleeting. You will never again be the person you are in this exact moment, so don't punish yourself for that person's sins.

I think the very fact that you're spending time self-reflecting and attempting to ascertain whether you really are a good man, that in itself is evidence that you are the person you need to be. A person who wants to be more tomorrow than they were today, and who is considerate enough to challenge their own decisions to ensure their heart is in the right place.

I don't think you can ask for anything more than that from any human being. Don't be too hard on yourself, mate.

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