Personally,i love you

i was raised by very traditional parents and i was brought up being afraid of the rod and/or the palm of my mother's hand - things that'd hit me if i did something wrong. That is how discipline is for me. It did help me grow into an obedient child. The process has it's perks but it also has its disadvantages. I grew up trying to be "perfect" and got depressed when i couldn't be, bc i felt like a failure and a disappointment. It's the reason why i always do what my parents wanted me to do even when i didnt agree with them. It's also the reason why i dont tell my parents the things that bother me. I would always think that even if i spoke out how i felt about something, It'd still be my fault. I hated the idea of us sitting down in a room and "talk" bc it made me scared. It still does.