Sounds like you're worrying too much about what hasn't even happened. "What ifs" are not certainties:
"What if someone important calls?"

"What if they don't? Then what?"

You managed to enjoy yourself at the party you went to, so my perspective is not to worry yourself too much about the future. After all, it's not set in stone and hasn't occurred yet.

Then when you leave you don't really want to return as you've said. So what that sounds like to me is that your mind is entrenched in the stresses of your life, while your heart is focused on the better things and simply living joyfully.

I mean, look at where you're going! At you can travel to these places and be happy and enjoy the sights! People would envy that kind of privilege. I wish i could travel right now at this very moment.

I'd say just enjoy yourself and don't let "what if" strike fear into you, to stop you from living. However, that is just my opinion.

Have a great travel experience and a great life. ^^