To punctuate or not to punctuate? That is the question.

Just as traffic rules are important, so in the world of the written word are the rules of punctuation.

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I look at text language on cel phones and literally shudder. It takes the stress off the person writing and puts it on the person trying to make sense of the message.

“Saw dr 2day heart ok E staying tho crisis water r u staying N Y lol over circus work c u soon J”

This is possibly telling the person receiving the text that a heart attack has been avoided by John/Jayne’s visit to the doctor. E is staying in spite of the continuing water shortage. A question arises over whether or not the person to whom J is writing might be staying on in New York. The colourful circus like conditions at work are making him/her laugh out loud and John/Jayne is hoping to see the recipient soon.
Whew totally exhausting and probably incorrectly interpreted.

Oh for some decent sentence construction, correct spelling and basic punctuation.

Does the following sign on Jim’s bedroom door,
NO GIRLS ALOUD mean that quiet ones would be welcome?

There is the classic puzzle about a ‘killer’ Panda…….

A PANDA BEAR EATS, SHOOTS, AND LEAVES.
I can imagine his guns blazing and bodies falling!

With the correct placement of the comma, it is a sentence simply informing us of a Panda’s dietary needs.
A PANDA BEAR EATS SHOOTS, AND LEAVES.
Delicious juicy young leaves are their favourite.

Careful punctuation can save lives.
HUNTERS
PLEASE USE CAUTION
WHEN HUNTING
PEDESTRIANS USING
HIKING TRAILS DO SO AT
THEIR OWN RISK.
A simple comma after the word HUNTERS and a full stop after HUNTING clears up the puzzle.

Further bloodshed and cannibalism is threatened if you read the following sign outside the local church.
ST PAUL’S UNITED CHURCH INVITES YOU TO THE BEST SAUSAGE SUPPER IN TOWN
COME AND EAT PASTOR BILL TURNER

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This sign is screaming for a full stop after the word EAT and the last 3 words on a new line.

What an insult to the local village children……….
SLOW
CHILDREN
PLAYING
A full stop or a line of …… after SLOW clears up the threat of calling the kids stupid.

Women at a university were outraged when the men in the lecture hall punctuated the following sentence like this……..
A WOMAN, WITHOUT A MAN, IS NOTHING.
They retaliated by posting on the notice board;
A WOMAN:
WITHOUT HER, MAN IS NOTHING.

A sleepy child is described as KID NAPPING.
It is sinister when the words are joined by a careless typist…… KIDNAPPING.

A totally confused message is being sent in ……
NEVER!
GIVE UP.
Defeat is acceptable with this punctuation.

NEVER GIVE UP. This full stop in the appropriate place is a heartfelt plea.

LET’S EAT GRANDPA…………Poor old Grandpa. Or should it be written, LET’S EAT, GRANDPA. A different cosy picture entirely!

Then there is the problem of too many full stops!

Admit. It. This. Took. You. Much. Longer. To. Read. Than. It. Should. Have.

I felt as though I was juddering to a stop in my car without using the clutch pedal.

In conclusion, this tongue in cheek comment about the importance of punctuating your work correctly, I leave you with two cheeky thoughts…………

People who do not use correct punctuation deserve a long sentence.

PRACTICE SAFE TEXT
USE COMMAS……………
and never miss a period

(I found several of these examples on the Internet. There was no author for each of them.)