I was having a conversation with a friend of mine, who is married but not in a happy relationship. I was checking with him that if he is not happy then why does he still continue in the relationship. He had many reasons for it and one of them which is the key one is the family. Both their families have a very strong connection and he does not want to disappoint them in any way. But for the same reason he also does not want to have children.
I find this a little sad, when your entire life you spend being unhappy because you do not wish to make other people around you unhappy. This is so common in India with many couples. They are not happy in their relationship but yet they continue because of the families. Here we believe that the marriage is just not between 2 individuals but between 2 families. Though the trends are changing now, but still majority succumb to these kind of societal pressures.
Living in any compromised relationship is not healthy for both the partners. What is the point of such a relationship where you are not by yourself, you are not able to express yourself to each other, you never feel 100% happiness. It's like giving up your whole life. I have always been advising him that either he should have some ways to amend his relationship or to close it. But at this moment he cannot see option on either one of them. He is not able to amend it nor is he able to break it, and this in-between stage is very dangerous and toxic for life.
Well, I can understand that everyone has things in their lives and what goes behind the close doors is only for the person to know, but at the end of the day living a life which constantly makes you feel unhappy is also wrong and not a act of self-love.
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