Emotional intelligence: Five factors you need to know

The world has had a long history of reverence towards geniuses. These people have high intelligence quotient or IQ and are considered outliers of the population. While IQ is still an important measure that can determine the trajectory of one’s life, another one has been deemed as more pressing: emotional quotient or emotional intelligence.

Emotional intelligence was first forwarded by psychologists Peter Salavoy and John Mayer in 1990. They defined emotional intelligence or EI as "the ability to monitor one's own and others' feelings and emotions, to discriminate among them and to use this information to guide one's thinking and actions." The concept was popularized by Dan Goleman in his book aptly titled, Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ, in 1995.

There are different ways to measure one’s EI such as Bar-On's Emotional Quotient Inventory (EQ-i), Mayer-Salovey-Caruso Emotional Intelligence Test (MSCEIT), and Emotional and Social Competence Inventory (ESCI). These are technical exams that can be administered by psychometricians. While we can’t take hold of these exams and interpret its results, we can already start developing our EI by understanding these factors that are crucial to one’s emotional intelligence:

Self-awareness

Goleman defines self-awareness as “knowing one’s internal states, preference, resources, and intuitions.” Self-awareness is deemed as the cornerstone of EI because it permits one to act consciously instead of operating on auto-pilot. It is essential to the understanding of one’s self particularly one’s strengths and weaknesses.

Self-regulation

While awareness means recognition, self-regulation pertains to control. It is the ability to monitor one’s self and act in accordance with one’s beliefs and values. Self-regulation helps us counter negative emotions with positive ones like cheering ourselves despite defeat or tempering our anger when somebody pisses us off. Accountability for one’s actions is critical to the development of self-regulation.

Self-motivation

Simply, self-motivation is one’s drive to act. It’s the force to start, do, and finish a task. To enhance EI, it is crucial to ask about motives which can be extrinsic or intrinsic. Extrinsic motives are external forces like money or fame. It is doing things because it needs to be done. Meanwhile, intrinsic motives are internal. It is doing things out of love.

Empathy

Empathy, as the saying goes, is walking a mile in other people’s shoes. It is the ability to perceive and understand other people’s feelings, motivations, and actions. Goleman identified the five elements of empathy namely: understanding others, developing others, having a service orientation, leveraging diversity, and political awareness. It can be said that while the EI factors are all equally important, empathy encompasses self-awareness, regulation, and motivation.

Social skills

There are many social skills that one must learn, but at the heart of all of these is communication. It is through communication that one can influence others in a positive and non-manipulative way, solve a conflict, institutionalize change, build connections, and foster collaborations.

We can’t all be Einsteins or Newtons or Darwins, but we can make contributions by becoming emotionally adept. After all, the world isn’t just about facts and equations; it also about people, and it is through EI and the factors named above that we can help people become the best of who they are.