To stay strong during tough times, it's essential to accurately recognize your feelings. Negative emotions can narrow your focus, making everything else fade away except that feeling.
For instance, someone who is angry may struggle to think clearly and could make choices they regret later. In contrast, positive feelings can broaden your perspective. A person who feels proud might look at their future with more optimism.
The first step in managing our feelings is to name them. It's important to regularly identify our negative emotions. A technique suggested by Dan Siegel is to complete the sentence, “I am currently feeling ……”
It can also help to remind ourselves, “I am not my emotion. This will pass.” For example, I might say, “I am currently feeling anxiety due to the pandemic.”
When negative feelings arise, it may not be obvious, but relaxation can be a powerful tool. For example, no matter how sad I might feel, if I get a massage, the comforting experience makes it hard to concentrate on my sadness.
The nice smells, soft lighting, and soothing music help a lot. When experiencing negativity, it's beneficial to engage in activities that promote relaxation. While at home, I practice yoga daily to help ease my mind.
After spending time online and feeling anxious, a 30-minute yoga session helps clear my head. Taking a shower can also provide a relaxing effect, as the water feels as if it's massaging away tension.
Breathing exercises are another great way to relax. These techniques, which are part of Mindfulness, can shift your focus and relieve negative emotions.
The key to overcoming negative feelings is to recognize them and take steps to calm ourselves.
Ultimately, the simple choices we make each day play a crucial role in building emotional strength. Sometimes, we might think we are relaxing but end up making poor choices. For example, indulging in sweets may feel comforting at first, but the guilt afterward leads to negative feelings.
Playing video games may seem like a way to unwind, but it does not provide true relaxation, as experts suggest. Therefore, it’s wise to choose consistent, relaxing habits that have positive long-term effects and to use those habits during tough emotional times.
For instance, even though I tend to be lazy, I do Pilates using YouTube videos because it's one of the few ways to exercise at home during quarantine. This helps me feel relaxed both from moving my muscles and from the satisfaction of saying, “Good job!” for making a healthy choice.