Anger is the negative feeling a person shows in response to threats, insults, unfairness, and similar situations. It is one of our core emotions, alongside happiness, surprise, and sadness. The way anger appears can differ based on the situation and the person's natural traits.
Some people are more likely to feel angry, while others are less so. For instance, adults with a Perfection-Seeking Temperament type known as DTM1 often value responsibility, fairness, kindness, and organization.
When they face situations where these traits are challenged, they may express anger, which is a negative aspect of their temperament. People with this temperament may get upset in response to unfairness or when things do not go as they wish.
An example of a temperament less prone to anger is the emotion-focused adult with the Seeking the Meaning of Emotions. These individuals are often genuine, friendly, and unique. They may feel anger when their feelings and differences are overlooked or when they cannot express themselves freely.
Thus, the circumstances under which a person gets angry and how they show that anger depend on their temperament.
Managing anger in adults differs for each temperament, including how intense the anger is and how it's expressed. Anger management techniques often develop from childhood experiences. It can help to establish standard ways to cope with anger.
To start, one should avoid rushing to speak. When feeling angry, an individual might communicate poorly due to pressure. Using a "stop, think, decide, and speak" approach can be effective.
Choosing the right words can be more important than the content itself. The way someone addresses another person plays a significant role in how the conversation will unfold. Speaking in a polite and calm manner can ease tensions for both parties involved.
Another important step is giving oneself time to think. Anger can cloud a person’s thoughts, and attempting to express feelings without clarity may lead to misunderstandings. It might be better to refrain from speaking when angry.
Often, discussing matters with strong feelings can lead to more anger rather than effective communication. During intense emotions, writing down thoughts instead of speaking can help clarify feelings.
If writing is not an option, drawing or doodling on paper might help the person visualize their emotions, increasing their awareness of what they feel. This understanding can serve as a brake on impulsive reactions.