Conflict is a natural part of every relationship, regardless of whether or not things are going well.
The use of conflict as a tool to nourish a relationship is something that is common in relationships that are doing well.
In harmonious relationships, partners who are able to recognise when tensions are beginning to rise are the ones who are able to take a step back, enquire about what is being played out right at that moment, and put an end to the drama that is now being performed.
After the game has been paused, you should take responsibility for your personal contribution to the conversation as well as the actions you took that contributed to the increased stress at that particular point.
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Own your feelings and pay attention to the underlying emotions that are visible on the surface, such as rage and disgust, that are shared by both you and your spouse. These underlying emotions typically include feelings of helplessness, fear of loss, loneliness, and disappointment.
Recognise that the negative cycle that is occurring at that same time is the one that is influencing the feelings that you are experiencing.
Find out how your partner is feeling by asking them.
Be honest with your spouse about the sentiments that are the most profound, sensitive, and tender in your heart.
And regardless of what takes place, you must always keep in mind that you are a member of the "same team."
If you have complaints such as "When the tension starts to escalate, we can't stop it or calm down physiologically," or "We explode all of a sudden and can't take a break!", you should seek the assistance of a couples therapist in order to improve your ability to deal with these kinds of problems.