Know why you must accept the negative of any situation? It will take up more space till accepted.
I often say, "To be what you want to be, you must accept being what you do not want to be," in my books and courses.
Your ego will try to disprove it or find reasons why it won't work. His reaction is reasonable since he doesn't grasp spiritual concepts like acceptance, unconditional love, responsibility, mirroring, forgiveness, and reconciliation taught by LISTEN TO YOUR BODY.
Your ego thinks if you accept yourself in bad states, you'll stay that way forever. Always remember that your ego is telling you something is wrong.
Consider a woman who wants to be upset often. He often starts a task and doesn't finish it since she's thinking about something else or is easily distracted. It's been her dream to be organised. The pros and cons of this situation are listed. Same for you. When you want to modify or criticise yourself, ask yourself what you think you should be and what you want to be.
Working with states of BEING, not behaviours, is crucial. The woman should not declare, “I am not finishing anything and what I want is to finish what I start”. We can only change behaviour with self-control.
Only acknowledging our states can bring lasting transformation. Despite the ego's belief, accepting ourselves or others leads to more pleasurable changes.
Why does everything have duality? Light and dark, up and down, love and hatred, quality and flaw, truth or fiction. Only this can teach discernment, true love, and intellect.
Duality gives us decision-making capacity to live smarter. Not accepting this duality in our ways of being goes against the planet's creative genius. Our ego thinks it's smarter than faultless divine creation.
When you don't accept yourself, a part of you feels rejected and will do all in its ability to attract your attention so you'll accept it as is.
Consider a curious boy who asks plenty of questions about everything. His mother, who works, runs the house, has a partner, and has two other children, is growing impatient with him. She pulls him away and tells him to stop asking questions.
The youngster will return to the charge if he feels rejected by his mother who does not accept him. He may even commit crimes to gain attention. This response is normal. Self-rejection has the same effect. Despite several diets, those who cannot lose weight stay overweight because they don't give themselves permission.
Giving ourselves permission to be what we don't want to be—including not criticising ourselves or becoming angry—makes it simpler to be what we want. My example woman will know she accepts herself when distracted others no longer disturb her. She will realise they are trying and have good intentions like her.
No one can manifest solely the positive aspects of any condition of being. The only people who control themselves prosper temporarily, but they all lose control.
Accepting yourself will help you become your ideal self. Accepting oneself will help you handle being what you don't want to be.