Simple Ways to Know If You're a Selfish Person, and How to Fix It

Thinking about oneself doesn't contradict kindness, selflessness, or solidarity. In today's society, being altruistic and giving can pay off. The inherent benefits will keep us motivated.

Thinking you must be selfish because society is selfish causes huge insecurity, as if the sole goal is to succeed. However, living a more generous, caring, and less individualistic existence attracts opportunities best.

Humans are selfish because we need to survive. But compassion was born for the same reasons. Humans would likely not have lived without civilizations.

Thus, we must redefine selfishness or interpret what is socially acceptable to find a balance between our interests and those of society.

Considering the good of all or one's neighbour is likewise selfish, since what's beneficial for the group or neighbour also benefits the individual. However, doing good for others helps the altruist.

Selfish people don't understand the value in giving others their time, knowledge, or resources. Selfish people believe that only things that benefit them are good or that a modest personal gain is always better than a large shared benefit.

Of course, having control is good, but what happens when someone else does? Dependence on others—what happens? Can you accept that responsibility is with the other and surrender to their decision?

Selfish people value their own contributions and needs more than those of others, especially if the latter depend on decisions that directly and predominantly affect others.

A selfish person must control everything that affects them, directly or indirectly. They are overly judgmental of others and rethink everything that involves sharing responsibility or surrendering control due to their control anxiety.

Collaboration takes listening, committing, and accepting others' ideas. This is related to the fixation with losing control we discussed earlier. Inability to work as a team may imply selfishness.

Collaboration, or collective intelligence, is needed to start a social movement today. Collaboration is crucial from learning to entrepreneurship.

No matter our thought patterns, we are all witnesses to what we can do if we work together and everyone contributes what they can to help others discover and develop their knowledge. This is hidden from selfish people because they assume what others gain is something they lose. Everyone wins.

To justify a failure, avoid injury is a common justification. Problem solving is more important than responsibility purification. A person who can't take responsibility is probably selfish and just cares about avoiding retaliation or bad appearances.

However, taking responsibility and accepting others' mistakes without judgement or humiliation is liberating. Taking responsibility without taking the blame is a beautiful act of self-compassion that extends to others when needed.

Feel like you constantly want more?
Because others come second, a dissatisfied person will always want more. Not being appreciative for everything will make a person sad and destitute, and they won't understand the worth in small things that they really need.

A shallow and materialistic person is usually selfish and solely interested in his own material demands, therefore he ignores others' needs, even spiritual ones.

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