Intelligent discipline helps people to consciously follow healthy rules and standards for their personal and collective growth.
It is a sensible form of discipline that breaks the mould of loose and dictatorial teaching.
Permissive education is as destructive as authoritarian education.
Without discipline, kids and teens would struggle to establish their character and achieve their goals.
“Discipline is man's best friend, for it helps him realise his deepest desires.”
Discipline-free education breeds irresponsibility, disobedience, selfishness, transgression, and immaturity.
On the other side, harsh discipline can make kids meek and afraid.
Education is worst when it alternates between laxity and authoritarianism.
This is typical of parents who over-punish or degrade their children.
They feel bad after this disproportionate punishment and become too indulgent with their child to feel better.
Permissive and authoritarian schooling
Before considering intelligent discipline, we must establish permissive and authoritarian education's main characteristics.
The main traits of permissive education:
Lack of explicit rules.
Always eager to satisfy the child/teen.
Continuously defend children's failings.
Catering to their every whim.
Avoid pressuring your child.
Forgive or negotiate penalties.
Allow the child to decide based on his own criteria.
Not prioritising timetables, order, and goals.
Give the child too much freedom and let him learn from his mistakes.
The main traits of authoritarian education:
Setting norms without explanation.
Punish every norm infringement harshly, regardless of severity.
Demanding complete control over the child's life.
Frequent, harsh physical and/or psychological punishment.
Giving instruction too much weight.
Avoid stimulating children and praising their successes.
Undervaluing the child's opinion.
Parental apathy or bad character often lead to permissive parenting. Authoritarian schooling is generally driven by parental trauma or fear.
Intelligent discipline instills values in youngsters by guiding them to recognise limitations and renounce unattainable aspirations.
Humans create countless dreams around their desires. We all have irreparable narcissism and desire attention.
Some selfish people desire everything for themselves. They are mini-dictators who crave power without fear of crushing others.
Discipline lets us experience modest amounts of frustration. Accepting these constraints teaches us that we are not alone and that we cannot always attain what we desire.
This learning gives us ways to adapt to the world.
This requires complex reasoning and frustration tolerance. Discipline helps us stay grounded.
Clear rules and consistent implementation provide us a firm reality vision. Self-confidence and respect for others increase over time.
Discipline lets us set realistic goals and have all the tools to attain them.
A healthy emotional baggage will help us avoid many troubles in life.
Instill these rules into your life for sensible discipline:
Set boundaries, not rules.
Allow clear standard application choices.
When a new standard is set, show the child that his viewpoint matters but does not win.
Intelligent discipline creates free and conscious people who can offer their best and follow the old proverb that underpins learning how to live together: “The freedom ends where that of others begins”.